THINKING OF QUITTING YOUR DAY-JOB?

I am in my ‘sharing some serious thoughts’ mode again. This topic may be of interest to some of you.

Many of us have long dreamed about leaving our jobs at some point in our career. Normally, the desire is not just some fancy whim; it is more serious than that. There are many valid reasons – we feel jaded and demotivated, no work-life balance, our jobs are thankless, stressful tasks that seem highly disproportionate to the salary and rewards received, uninspiring and condescending bosses that revel in making our working hours hell on earth, having to handle mental abuse, the negative internal politicking when trying to climb up the career ladder, having to deal with uncooperative and incompetent work colleagues, the lack of visibility, and hence the feeling of not-quite-belonging, in a large organisation, and many more.

It does not really matter whether you are white-collar or blue-collar, or where you are in the rung of the career ladder – whether you are near the top or the bottom of your organisation’s hierarchy – being part of an organisation where you are just a member of staff means a number of things. If you are working for a really large organisation, it normally boils down, though not limited, to the following:

• Legally, for 5 days a week, for at least eight hours a day, you take on a specific role, for the benefit of the employing organisation.
• The employing organisation control, or have the right to control, what you do and how you do your job. This still applies even when you are given the so-called ‘freedom of action’.
• Your personal goals and ambitions are not in the first priority list of your employing organisation.
• The criteria for progression in your job are not necessarily just based solely on excellent ideas, hard work and dedication. Your employing organisation decides whether or not you have the potential to be progressed, based on their criteria, and this criteria information may or may not be made available to you.
• You have to abide by the policies set by the organisation, whether or not you believe in their fairness and equity.
• You also have to accept and comply when your employing organisation changes policies that affect you, without consulting you first.
• Apart from the immediate workplace that you are in, most of the time, you do not really know, or understand, what’s going on in your organisation.
• Many a time, your employing organisation dictates the kind of relationship you can have, or cannot have, with the other people working in the organisation.
• Your employing organisation also specifies, either expressed or through ‘unwritten rules’, the acceptable behavioural conduct to apply with certain people in the organisation, for examples how you dress, how to approach and speak to certain authority figures.
• No matter what, you can be replaced at any time.
• Your employing organisation does not have any loyalty attachment to you personally.
• If you are a permanent employee, you are expected to leave when you reach ‘retirement age’.

In exchange, your employing organisation gives you:

• Monthly salary
• Annual bonuses
• Benefits:

The list of benefits generally includes the following:

• Leave –a set number of days in a year where you are permitted to not attend to work, be it for taking holidays, sick leave, compassionate leave, public holidays.
• Education assistance for your children (sometimes limited to a ‘magic’ maximum number).
• Accommodation assistance in the form of providing a place for you (and your family) to stay. May also be given in the form of monetary allowance or a housing ownership scheme.
• Some sort of savings fund (dictated fully by them).
• Loans assistance either in the form of subsidised interest rates or as an enabler for you to take up a new loan.
• Workers’ compensation in case of accidents, injuries or death.

These benefits may vary depending on which organisation you work for.

The point is, there is an exchange.
The issue is, whether that exchange is mutually agreeable by both parties i.e. between you and your employing organisation.

If you happen to be in a lucky position where it is a mutually agreeable exchange, then thinking about leaving your job may be categorised as just a ‘fancy whim’. The logical thing to do is to stay put.

The million dollar question is - what do you do when the exchange is not personally agreeable to you? With the exception of you being the lucky recipient of a miraculous major windfall, like inheriting a couple of million dollars from somewhere, or winning ridiculous amounts of money on all the Lucky Draws offered by so many organisations nowadays, the decision to leave your stable job needs serious and very careful thought. There are so many options available, but they all have their pros and cons - they all present some pretty serious risks which may be too great. The future opportunities, however rosy the picture is, may not be attainable. Many of us did not consider this aspect of employment life when we first handed in our job applications – it did not seem to matter then – what mattered was to secure a job and to be financially independent. And of course, this was never a highlighted item during job interviews. It is amazing how strong an impact our employing organisation can have on us as individuals, on our families, our lives; sometimes this hold can feel like it is much stronger than the family bond.

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Let’s face it, being an employee provides us with a sense of certainty, security and stability – knowing that money is paid into our bank account at the end of every month gives us inner comfort that we are able to provide a roof over our head, pay for basic daily life necessities, pay bills, as well as contribute to our families, parents and guardians – these are very important things. It also affords us luxury items like holidays abroad, a new car, and expensive presents for ourselves, our families and friends. This is definitely no joking matter. Being in a job allows us predictable comforts and a degree of lifestyle quality. It does benefit us in a big way and not something to be taken for granted. We live in a world of consumerism, that is why, after a few years of getting used to certain comforts and lifestyle quality, we become so attached to our jobs, just like the skin on our bodies. Understandably, leaving your job can be one of the toughest decisions you will ever make.

Furthermore, nowadays, having a job does not only pay the bills, it also serves to define us, or so it seems. Let’s just think about that for a moment. When we meet with new people or old friends, one of the things that people ask is ‘So what are you doing now?’ or ‘Where do you work?’ and in a status-conscious society like ours, being associated with certain organisations can at times bring about a seemingly higher sense of pride, or on the other hand, can cause some discomfort, depending on who’s asking. One can almost be excused to experiencing varying feelings of relative pride, and at other times, feelings of insecurity, disapproval and belittlement.

One other important thing that our job offers is the opportunity to make friends, stay connected and have positive interactions. Many of the friends we know over the years are also our colleagues. Leaving our jobs may mean losing, to a certain extent, those social interactions and the benefits and comforts that friends provide.

Personally, it took me a number of years of research, serious consideration and discussions with people before I finally took action to leave my very stable job. It was a very difficult decision to make, especially when I have served seventeen long years. I reached quite a comfortably senior position, with a role that required me to report directly to the company directors. The salary was generous and the benefits plentiful. There were many questions that needed to be answered - ‘Do I really want to do this? Do I want to give this away? Have I done enough research? Am I adequately prepared? Am I being selfish to want this? What if it doesn’t work out as I imagined it to be? Will I be OK being dependent on my partner as the main and only family member bringing in money for the family? What will I have to sacrifice? What new things will I have to learn? Who and where do I go for help? etcetera. Many times, when I answered one question, another 10 new ones cropped up. I did not have answers to all my questions and I knew I never will. I then decided to bite the bullet.

The changes I experience since leaving the job have been pretty significant, to say the least. The set routines I was used to no longer apply. There was what I call ‘the honeymoon period’ where I enjoyed the freedom of being no longer tied to the normal set routines. After a few weeks of this, I knew that I had to do something else. I want to ensure that I feel productive daily by being focused on doing things that meet a certain goal or a purpose, or at least contribute to that. The major difference now is that my goals are largely based on two things: achieving family closeness by providing a more conducive and healthy family environment where everyone feels loved, supported and encouraged to be the best they can be; and secondly, having fun through experimenting new things and doing things I love, like gardening, painting, etc.

It was not too long ago since I left, only ten months to be exact, but already I see some of the changes that I have always wanted to see. There is a marked difference especially with regard to the closeness with my children. Spending more time with them helps me keep in touch with what’s really happening in their lives, enables me to have more meaningful and deeper interactions, which gives rise to better understanding, respect and trust between us. This is invaluable.

I also experience a new way of life. Life without a big fat mortgage hanging over your head is tremendously liberating. At the same time, with a significantly reduced income, I had to learn pretty quickly the value of money and the importance of being thrifty. This I must admit was very hard at first. I loved shopping (I still do!) and I was an impulsive big spender – a habit I developed a long time ago so. Breaking that habit was one hell of a feat for me. Please do not take this lightly. It was really hard, not to mention, mentally very stressful! I mean, no more regular shopping binges, decadent spas, or weekend getaways that our family were used to. We now treat money earned with a new kind of respect. Now we calculate everything to ensure that we get best value for the amount of money spent which help greatly in reducing our living expenses. Funnily enough, even my children seem to understand and are acting accordingly. They now know not ask for money just so that they could spend it irresponsibly.

I now freelance as a consultant, providing coaching to individuals and corporate organisations, which, to a highly-reduced degree, gives me a bit of that ‘corporate life’ feel. For a small start-up business like mine, I think it is doing reasonably well. At this point in time however, it is not my first priority to drive it at full speed just yet. That can wait for now.

Do I regret my decision? Not one bit. The plus points far outweigh the discomforts and sacrifices. I feel good inside and out knowing that I am spending the majority of my time doing things that I love and that my actions match my talk when I say I treat my family as my first priority. More importantly, there’s also self-approval - both my head and my heart tell me that it is the right thing to do.

I am not suggesting that everyone should leave their stable jobs. There are other options that can also lead to similar desired outcomes. It may be a matter of changing how you manage your personal perspectives and your outlook on your role as an employee, your life priorities and goals. If you find that it is financially too risky to leave, find ways to make your job environment more positive and conducive, and avoid taking on the victim/martyr mentality. Take positive action within your circle of influence. You may find that after a while, you may enjoy your job and not want to leave after all. There’s a quote I like: "I've met a few people who had to change their jobs in order to change their lives, but I've met many more people who merely had to change their motive to service in order to change their lives." - Peace Pilgrim